BIT:            A word used to describe computers, as in "Our son's
                computer cost quite a bit."

BOOT:           What your friends give you because you spend too much time
                bragging about your computer skills.

BUG:            What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green
                computer screen for more than 15 minutes.
                Also: what computer magazine companies do to you after
                they get your name on their mailing list.

CHIPS:          The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to
                avoid having to leave their keyboards for meals.

COPY:           What you have to do during school tests because you spend
                too much time at the computer and not enough studying.

CURSOR:         What you turn into when you can't get your computer to
                perform, as in "You $#% computer!"

DISK:           What goes out in your back after bending over a computer
                keyboard for seven hours.

DUMP:           The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you
                get a new computer.

ERROR:          What you made the first time you walked into a computer
                showroom to "just look."

EXPANSION UNIT: The new room you have to build on to your home to house

your computer and all its peripherals.

FILE:           What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half
                hours a day, now that the computer does her day's work in
                30 minutes.

FLOPPY:         The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due
                to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food
                (see chips).

HARDWARE:       Tools, such as lawn mowers, rakes and other heavy
                equipment you haven't laid a finger on since getting
                your computer.

IBM:            The kind of missile your family members and friends would
                like to drop on your computer so you'll pay attention to
                them again.

MENU:           What you'll never see again after buying a computer
                because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant.

MONITOR:        Often thought to be a word associated with computers,
                this word actually refers to those obnoxious kids who
                always want to see your hall pass at school.

PROGRAMS:       Those things you used to look at on your television before
                you hooked your computer up to it.

RETURN:         What lots of people do with their computers after only
                a week and a half.

TERMINAL:       A place where you can find buses, trains and really good
                deals on hot computers.

WINDOW:         What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally
                erase a program that took you three days to set up.